On Sunday I got acceptance into my first choice of University/program \:'D/ Ryerson Bdes- fashion design.
In unrelated news I'm pretty sure this girl who I've known for seven years as a best friend pretty much thinks I'm a disgusting pig nowadays because I can't get a job so I can afford to eat at high-end restaurants and buy high-end things and watch all the oscar-nominated and Quentin Tarantino movies ever. I'm not ~classy or mature enough for her friendship I guess :( Like today we were choosing roommates for the art department field trip and everyone was trying to reorganize as there were four groups of three. She asked my two inseparable friends who was alone in their room and I just raise my had and she stares at me and looks away, no comment. She's just seemed extra rude towards me for the past year or so. Maybe I should just send her a message telling her that I don't appreciate the way she's been treating me lately.
I'm the kind of person who can't live without a support system a short distance behind me. And despite the fact that I have a small circle of some of the greatest, dumbest, most talented friends in the world I still feel lonely.
Maybe I'm just really tired and after 100 years of sleep everything would feel better :| I think I have seasonal affective disorder D:
And basically I'm forced to eat dim sum every. single. goddamn. day. because that's what the entirety of my extended family wants to do (Or at least my grandma wants to, and her two sons and eight daughters plus the house maid don't refuse her.) I was taking the subway back to my aunt's house where I'm staying and the fact that I'm eating dim sum again tomorrow almost made me want to cry.
Before I left Canada my friend Annabel told me to find her a kawaii Cantonese boy [and cut a lock of his hair to give to her loooool]. But I don't have access to the cutest boys in Hong Kong so I told her my cousins would have to suffice Tbh my younger-older-cousin who has a fauxhawk is kind of attractive-but it's the kind of handsome that's model-ugly-hot that will disappear in the next twenty-or-so years because he's underweight (naturally, not ED) and smokes. My aunts are always like "All the guys you draw in your sketchbook look like him you both dress in so much black you two should go shopping together and everyone will stare at you and think you're a couple HAHAHAHAHA!" But apparently he's also a romantic, as I overheard my mom saying he told her that he folded a 99-origami-rose bouquet for his girlfriend (or to get back his girlfriend, I'm not sure).
Oh look at me somewhat crushing on my cousin, sf blasphemous I'm going to hell.
He also has an older brother (who looks like my friend Annabel if she got a tan) and his name is Justus. Yes, seriously. JUST. US. Like Justice, but spelt wrong and just depressingly hurmourous. Kind of like how Arezu's cousins knew a girl in Hong Kong named Provides.
Still his features are sf fascinating that I just want to stare at him forever. Times like this make me wish I was invisible just so I could stare at the very attractive, very intruiguing, very skinny, and/or very interestingly-dressed people of Hong Kong.
During the summer my friend went to Paris and got me a box of macarons from Laduree. They were the greatest things ever so when I go to New York with my friends in the spring on an art field trip I am going to Laduree even if I become broke and fat ;A;
There's this feeling inside me, like a little pulsing beat made of the most unspeakable evil thing. I know that it's going to continue growing inside of me for... god knows how long, but one day it will simply take over my entire body and I will hurt everyone I know. Sometimes I can feel it rise up into my throat but it always settles back down again. It is simply in my chest, luminescent and made of black, constantly thrumming.
I really think I will commit suicide or die in a terrible self-inflicted accident.
Everything is dumb.
So I went downtown yesterday to do some labour day weekend shopping (and some D'espa hunting-but I was unsuccessful). I got a neat blazer from H&M that desperately needs ironing.
My art teacher told me that he'd like it if I finished a painting but I never got around to it. I don't really like it anyways.
I think my dad's side of the family doesn't like me at all. I think they hate me tbh :\ They're quite rude and loud and I always feel unwelcome in their home.
Earlier today I told my friend about how the french word "pet" means fart. So that would mean people are calling their animal companions their farts. Like "this is my fart cat, Bubbles" or "this is my fart dog, Bomber". And if a guy ever called his girl "pet" he would be calling her his fart. Couples' "pet names" are thus "fart names".
So my friend and I were talking about D'espairsRay and I told her that Hizumi should consider surgery like Jui from Vidoll (but the more I think about it the more I wonder if that would help him?) and she said
"What if after the surgery
his voice sounded like
Miku from An Cafe"
*for some reason I can't post the table flipping.
But it's what's best for them and I'll support them in whatever direction they go. My friend and I are considering making one of those short farewell videos with her torn up poster which made Zero go "OHOHOHOHO!"
Merry Christmas everyone :VVV
I just snuck downstairs and put my mom's present under the tree.
Mum and I already had "Christmas dinner" like two days ago :V We went to one of those "big-plates-small-portions" restaurants in Toronto. They had Tim Burton themed food,
though I don't really care for him :x It's because there's a Tim Burton art exhibit going on in the same building (the Bell lightbox- it's the home of TIFF). So I had lamb sirloin with blackcurrant jam for dinner and a Willy Wonka for dessert. Chocolate, peanut butter ice cream, and caramelized banana.
The bill? Not so much. But I guess it isn't such a bother for rich people that eat regularly at such places ;A ;
I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE BOXING DAY DEALS AND THE RIDICULOUS SPREES AND I NEED NEW JEANS ALTHOUGH I ALREADY HAVE 12 PAIRS BUT ONLY WEAR FOUR OH YEAH. IDK WHAT I WILL SPEND MY CHRISTMAS MONEY ON OH NOOOOO.
I also went to the Asian mall and got the January 2010 issue of Popteen, and Kumicky's not on the cover 8U It's still super kawaii though. The same mall has like 6.5 billion stores that sell ridic marked up gyaru burando. I saw this ~fabulous DELYLE phone strap that I saw on mbok for 1000yen selling for $76. Some other store had ~hookertastic d.i.a shorts that spewed gold sparkles everywhere for $425. THE FUCK MAN. NO. *barfs everywhere*